Ratchetrospective - Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters

There’s only one Ratchet and Clank Game I never covered during the original Ratchetrospective run, or during sequel month (or a rage review – like with Secret Agent Clank) and that’s Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters. It’s the first of the 2 games heralded by High Impact Games, a team that has previous games covered in Rage4Media reviews such is Jak and Daxter: The Lost Frontier, and Secret Agent Clank. To its credit, Size Matters is better than both of those but we’ve got a way to go to explain why.

High Impact Games was made up of former Insomniac Games and Naughty Dog employees and were tasked to creating games for Sony’s handheld console of the time, the PSP. The problem is that Ratchet and Clank was a title designed for 2 analogue sticks and 8 buttons, and with the PSP you’re down to 1 analogue stick, and 6 buttons (they cheat to make a 7^th one) this is a problem in both Secret Agent Clank and The Lost Frontier as well.

But enough preamble, let’s take a look at Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters

Plot

Ratchet and Clank are having a vacation on Pokitaru, Ratchet is being a bit of jerk, something we hadn’t really seen since the first game whilst Clank is building sandcastles for some reason and is talking about their heroic duty. OK… Suddenly, they’re interrupted by a girl named Luna, who wants some pictures of them doing heroic bits and bobs for her school project.

So Ratchet and Clank go out and kill some locals and native wildlife in a brief tutorial, how heroic of them. Once they're done, Luna is kidnapped by some robots and Ratchet and Clank race to save her, they’re too late and the robot says they’re taking her to Kallidon, Luna drops an artefact that Clank identifies as a Technomite artefact. Ratchet is skeptic of this because the plot says so. If it’s official in Clank’s database then they can’t be just a story!

Oh and Captain Qwark is around so they can force him into this story. Gotta tell you, it doesn’t really work. They find some co-ordinates etched in the side of the artefact and follow them, not to Kalidon but to Ryllus, the Vegatta Jungle, none of this is mentioned in story by the way, I had to look that up on the planet map. Anyway, Qwark has decided suddenly he wants to find out about his family, he was raised by monkeys, apparently and never knew his parents... Ratchet and Clank explore, picking up a new gadget, and find the co-ordinates for Kallidon in a map room very similar to the one in Tools of Destruction, except this time it’s in a Temple.

So, Captain Qwark has found some information on a website called fauxfamily.com about his family so he heads off for a while whilst Ratchet and Clank head to Kalidon. There they meet a surfer dude, who challenges them to a race with their prize being a shrink ray that he has because the plot says so. They get into the vicinity and rescue Luna but…

Ratchet is captured and Clank is dumped in a robot battle. Clank manages to escape and is greeted by this game’s Plot Convenience Fairy, Skrunch the Monkey. He somehow knows where Ratchet is, at a research station being experimented on. Clank transforms into giant form and flies after him. Ratchet is trapped in his own nightmare scenario that fortunately comes complete with ammo vendors and bolt crates. Clank arrives, having confronted absolutely no guards and helps pull Ratchet out of his dream, he’s been disarmed of all his weapons but not the shrink ray! I guess the guards didn't think that was a threat, or something.

Ratchet’s anger issues are reignited by this event and he blows up the facility in a fit of rage, just barely making it to their ship and escaping in time. For some reason they stick around after the explosion and they run into the surfer dude again, who races them, again, for a gadget, again.

So after that bit of nothing, they find themselves on another planet run by the technomites, Challax, it’s shrunk down but they manage to fight their way through the facility and discover that Luna is in fact a technomite infiltration robot, with technomites inside running her. They follow her to the Dayni moon, a planet where the sheep turn into monsters at night. They eventually defeat Luna, and she reveals that the technomites are tired of being ignored are now creating their own Ratchet army to make some noise. OK, this is a dumb plan but it gets dumber, believe me.

Clank tries to interface with Luna but whilst being uncharacteristically cocky about it, no surprise he ends up shorted out by one of her defences, with some technomites jumping into him. Ratchet shrinks down to help, and once again Clank’s interior comes complete with weapons vendors and crates of all sorts.

Ratchet helps his pal clean up his infection, and between the two, they find the factory creating the Ratchet clones. After fighting the poor imitations off, they’re confronted by the head of the Technomites, Otto Destruct, and boy is that a sh*t name. Anyway, also there is Captain Qwark, who believes that Otto is his father, really. Otto had lured him here using fauxfamily.com because…

Otto says their original motive about credit is a lie and it’s actually a plan to *checks notes* gather the most intelligent people of the universe and transfer their brains into his. So, Batman what do you think of that plan?

Yeah, that just about covers it, the Plot Convenience Fairy shows up after Ratchet and Clank defeat Otto, revealing that Qwark’s real parents were killed (gotta have that cliché) by defective equipment created by the technomites, they were also apparently great heroes in their day. Qwark is enraged by this and tries to use the machine to transfer his own intelligence into Otto, wouldn’t that just make Otto smarter, but only by a tiny bit, how does he lose out here? But the Plot Convenience Fairy takes his place and… Gives Otto the brain of a monkey. Qwark was shrunk in the battle and Ratchet decides to not do something about that, because he’s a d*ck, and the remaining Ratchet clones are sold as toys or something… what?

Plot Analysis

I seems to me it wasn’t the writers who jumped ship from Naughty Dog and Insomniac because this plot is terrible. It’s not as bad as Secret Agent Clank's was, it is at least possible to consider this a legitimate entry in the Ratchet and Clank canon. But the problems are numerous and significant.

The first off is the characterisation of Ratchet and Clank seem off. Clank seems mostly OK but flip flops a lot between being the cautious one to being the optimist, in particular with regards to Luna.

Clank’s all knowingness in this is a little bit too far too. He knows from his ‘memory banks’ about the technomites. He remembers them? Then seems to know about the technomite map room because of reasons. Ratchet seems a bit more aloof and lazy than he was past the first game, he displays impatience, and almost cruelty at some points that isn’t characteristic of him.

Then there’s Captain Qwark and I can’t believe I’m saying this but Qwark is too dumb. Qwark is not the sharpest tool in the shed, I’ll grant them that but here, he’s like a child. In the original trilogy, Captain Qwark came up with an executed successful plans time and time again. His weakness is his ego, he became wrapped up in his own image, he doesn’t always see things clearly. He’s also a coward, but that’s by-the-by. Here he spends the entire game being manipulated by the villain for the Nefarious purpose of… I have no f*cking clue. Qwark didn’t really need to be in this game, he serves no major purpose in the plot. At least something came out of his inclusion in Secret Agent Clank (and he was more in character)

Time to talk about the technomites, and they’re how technology works, huh? Little creatures are inside the machines making them work. Exploitative, no? Good thing our lead character isn’t carrying tons of weapons. Anyway, Luna and Otto are both really really boring villains and I have nothing to say about either of them, except of course for their plan is stupid and awful.

Gameplay differences

Control Scheme

The standard Ratchet controls are familiar enough that you should get the grasp of them quickly, the action buttons do the same actions that they do in the regular game. The shoulder buttons now rotate the camera, and holding both of them is how you crouch to do high and stretch jumps. This is awkward as hell and probably why they ditched the roll in The Lost Frontier. The directional buttons now control your strafing, unless you change the control scheme to lock-strafe like I do. Aiming now happens through the select button which is all kinds of irritating but necessary for a few weapons

Jetboard Races

ARGH! This mini-game is so damn annoying, the controls are overly slippery, meaning it’s difficult to avoid obstacles. The only saving grace is you have opponents that adapt to your performance, meaning you might have a chance of winning anyway. Also, the shortcuts on the base ruins make that race ridiculously easy

Clank Battles

If you like the arena battles but didn’t care about earning experience and bolts through the combat, we’ve got the mini-game for you.

*Crickets chirping*

What? Play a game of dodgems in a car which either has a shunt attack, saw blades, an electric blast and last and definitely least, spikes.

Clankball

You get introduced to a toss mechanic in an early Clank level that kinda reminds me of Orxon from the first game at points. Anyway, that toss mechanic becomes a moving a suit which you pick up and throw balls into a goal. It’s usually pretty easy but keep an eye on the bombs

Gadgebot Guide

In the only attempt at any sort of puzzle in this game, you must guide gadgebots into the bot-port by selecting the right commands. I'll give credit for the attempt, but ultimately this puzzle outstays its welcome and becomes rather tedious. 

Giant Clank in Space

This is basically an on rails shooter where you fly as Giant Clank. I said I enjoyed these in my Secret Agent Clank review, but they do go on for too long and if there are long segments where you have to avoid obstacles which just drag. For some reason when you play as Giant Clank later on, he has similar controls to Ratchet and Clank 2, minus the bombs

Clank Turret

You really have a lot to do as Clank in this game, this is boring though, you protect Ratchet using an ice turret as he fixes a door. It’s really just a 1-level gimmick and it’s not particularly good.

Grind Lock

The only real in-game use of the shrink ray. It’s a fine idea, using a grind rail to unlock a door.

Customisable armour

This sounds like a great idea, on paper, but there’s a reason this hasn’t been implemented in later games. The newer armour is ALWAYS better. It’s not like it requires any hefty exploration, either, they’re usually found on the beaten track or as prizes for the mini games. Each armour set has a unique gimmick, but the gimmicks are basically wrench upgrades and this game will do you no favours if you’re doing a wrench only run. 

Weapons

This game has a measly 13 weapons, including a Blaster, Bomb Glove (with acid), Shotgun, Flame Thrower, Sniper Rifle (with bomb attachment) and Rocket Launcher (electric type). Returning from previous games are the Agents of Doom/Dread and Suck Cannon/Vortex Cannon, and the Static Barrier/Repulsor Field is basically a glorified shield charger, we also have a morph gun that turns people into cows and the RYNO, which I haven’t bought because it’s expensive and you need powerful guns to get through this game because those enemies soak up ammo. You can purchase some upgrades in certain vendors but they offer only minor support.

So that leaves us with 2 weapons

Bee Mine Glove/Killer Bee Mine

This weapon tosses out a bee hive and the bees attack nearby enemies. The problem early on it does so little damage. I don’t care that you level up, I was promised a Deadly Bee Weapon

  

And you could barely harm a fly

Laser Tracer/Optical Maser Array

A powerful weapon that requires you to be still to be still while firing, to counterbalance they make you immune to long ranged attack whilst firing, but if they get close, your ass is grass.

And that’s it, I’m not buying the RYNO, it’s the same one as Secret Agent Clank, it’s the most powerful weapon in the game, as it should be but hardly a unique looking one.

Gameplay Critique

Let’s talk a bit about the game outside of its weapon choice. By and large the art design is pretty good, although I hear it’s not translated very well when it comes to the PS2 port. I did notice some details popping in and out as I get close to them, but I’m willing overlook it. The Giant Clank segments still hold up as some of the best-looking moments in the game. The designs are authentic to the series as it was back in the PS2 era.

The Music is pretty good, carrying over the PS2 music style that ultimately dropped away when from A Crack in Time.

The controls are stiff, Ratchet moves too slow, and the reverse becomes the problem with the hoverboard and the Clankball mini games. And this bears repeating, your weapons do sh*t damage, none of them have the impact they should. In challenge mode, there’s a section where you’re limited to having just a blaster, mine hadn’t had the Titan (their equivilant to Mega) upgrade yet, the room had 1 mid-level enemy and 4 minor ones. I unloaded the weapon’s entire ammo supply on them, and I still had to go in with the wrench. This isn’t acceptable difficulty, make your enemies smarter or more precise, don’t make them impossible to kill.

Speaking of that, there is some bullsh*t they pull later on. The Luna Boss fight has 5 stages, and if you die on any of them, you’re right back to the start. Not helping is the fact that while your weapons are underpowered, most enemies can kill you in 3 hits. The camera's control isn’t great and can make platforming tricky. The worst example is the set-piece with the technomite dropship.

There’s multiplayer but my PSP won’t go online anymore and I can’t remember it that well, sorry.

Conclusion

Ratchet and Clank had to make compromises for a tiny disk for a hand-held console, which is why I’m not knocking its short length and lack of exploration. But whilst there is some good here, particularly with the design and aesthetic it’s let down by a weak story, poor controls in some areas and frustratingly tough enemies

Rating 60/100