Redux Month - Stormbreaker (Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker)

It’s time to address some flaws, welcome to redux month

Through the month of March, I’m going to be taking another look at films I’ve previously reviewed, correcting any mistakes I’d noticed, and/or adding in some new perspective. And the first film I’m gonna be recovering is Stormbreaker.

This was one my earlier reviews (but not the earliest I’m covering) and it’s one I have some regrets over, I have now read the book and I think it’s fine, not one of my favourites, but I might check out the upcoming Alex Rider series they’re developing.

When I first reviewed this film, I concluded that over-marketing could be the reason for the film’s failure, it wasn’t, that was really naïve of me to say. Marketing certainly was a factor for this but the blame seems to land at the feet of everyone’s favourite company, the Weinstein company, who clearly didn’t like the film, gave it a trailer featuring more Ewan McGregor than there was in the film and didn’t bother giving it a wide release in the US, it went straight to DVD in other territories too, this may be the consequence of not having a big studio like Warner Bros. behind it like Harry Potter did.

Its reception probably didn’t help either, it holds a 35% Rotten Tomatoes rating and only a 53% audience score.

So, let’s take another look at Stormbreaker and see what else I missed.

If you want a beat-for-beat summary, check my other review, I’ll summarise here. 14-year old Alex Rider goes to the rare school in the UK that doesn’t have school uniform, and it’s here you see the tone this film is going for. The badly shot chase scene featuring Ewan McGregor goes onto a beach and they crash through a Punch and Judy puppet show. It occurs to me that this film is kind of camp, no-one around seems to be reacting to the violence and destruction, it’s really quite jarring

He’s killed by an assassin hanging upside down from a helicopter, he fires two shots through the window which will make you question why the car is riddled with bullet holes the next time you see it. Alex lives with Jack (Alicia Silverstone) she’s a concerned parental figure which is honestly more than she was in the book.  

Through some thorough investigative work, wait, no *checks notes* a bike chase straight from a 90’s kids flick (this film was released in 2006), he finds the aforementioned bullet ridden car, gets trapped in it as it’s about to be crushed and escapes from it by hard work and luck *checks notes* no, a convenient ejector seat because this spy car is the one from Looney Tunes. I know spy cars are hardly exclusive but the book actually didn’t bother with it, which I thought was better.

He goes to the Bank where his father worked *checks notes* no, Liverpool Street Station because some guy mentions it. He finds out here that his father is a spy, and they want him to be one also. They even dangle the carrot in front of him that his father was secretly training him (maybe but he’s 14!!!) Anyway, they resort to blackmail as it turns out Jack is living without a visa. This should have been taken a lot more seriously than it is. He gets trained and nearly kills some people, then finds out his mission is to complete his father’s mission, find out about the mysterious Stormbreaker.

He then gets gadgets by visiting the gadget man at *checks notes* Harrods Toy Store, how desperate for money were you? The book was filled with product placement, but at least it made sense, what is this? It’s Steven Fry though, I can’t be that angry.

He immediately breaks cover by accidentally blurting his name aloud, wait *checks notes* he brings his personal phone with him because he’s a moron and none of his superiors thought to check that. The Stormbreaker turns out to be VR software with dodgy special effects but there are more sinister secrets beneath.

This film is bad, it’s really bad. The level of scenery chewing by the likes of Bill Nighy, Mickey Rourke, Missi Pyle and Andy Serkis makes it abundantly clear that this wasn’t being taken too seriously. As a spy story it’s fairly stock and its one unique attribute, that the child was blackmailed into it, is something that’s underutilised.

The film favours action over Alex using any sort of deductive reasoning which would be fine if the action scenes didn’t suck. If Power Rangers can get away with using martial arts and still be considered somewhat child friendly, why not this? What was that business with the rope (and why were they trying to kill Alex anyway?) why the stupid action scene inter-spliced with a cartoon? What on earth were they doing with the camera in that opening chase?

But that being said, I still think there’s something of merit here, it’s campness is kind of endearing to me, it’s clear it’s not something you should take too seriously and I had fun watching it, even if it required me to disengage my brain for a bit. As a starter for a franchise though, this was the wrong way to go about it. It needed to take itself a little more seriously, have a director who can direct action… and actors, oh and Google Sodium Pentothal for goodness sake.

Rating 40/100