Guilty Pleasures #14 - Skyfall

Ah, James Bond, an icon of action, suspense and damsels in distress, and to be honest, despite my film preferences, 007 was never really something I grew attached to like I have with superheroes. But my curiosity piqued with Skyfall. Due to not booking a ticket online, I never saw it in the Cinema, but I was quick to get a DVD copy.

Production involved in this film looks quite complicated. MGM, the producers of the films was undergoing financial troubles and the project, which had started just after the release of Quantum of Solice, was suspended. During the suspension, the original writer of the story, Peter Morgan departed leaving Neal Purvis, Robert Wade and John Logan to finish it off. In fact filming didn’t begin until November 2011.

These delays didn’t hamper the success of the film. Made over a billion dollars world-wide, the highest of any Bond film, on your average blockbuster budget ($150-200m) and getting praised by most critics. However, I stand by this as a Guilty Pleasure because despite all this, the story has some pretty big flaws.

Before I begin the review, I will say this. I have not watched any other of Daniel Craig’s Bond movies, in fact this is the only Bond movie I’ve watched unless it’s a few bits I’ve seen on television. I am not reviewing this as a 50^th Anniversary for Bond, I’m watching it as a movie and it will stand or fall on its own merits.  With that out of the way, let’s take a look.

I'm James Bond, don't ask why my face is in shadow, I'm just that mysterious

In our opening shot we see James Bond’s shadow moving closer in, he walks with his gun raised to a door, but finds 2 dead guards and a laptop missing a hard-drive. He tries to stop the bleeding of a final guard, but M tries to force him to after whoever stole the hard drive.

James walks out and enters a truck the guys in the Black Audi (buy us now $50,000) and they pursue. As they drive through a market and try to ram the car, the end up flipping it on its side and a shootout begins. One of the perps rides off on a nearby motorcycle, James pursues on one he borrows with our driver (whose name isn’t revealed to the end) following behind.

Hey, would you mind moving out of the shot? We wanna see James land on the train

M warns them they can’t afford to lose a list which is apparently on the hard drive. The bike chase continues with them riding one convenient rooftops, through more markets with the driver smashing through cars to cut him off. She succeeds, causing a lot of damage, but the perp jumps off the bridge onto the, James follows suit, barely grabbing onto the train.  M orders the driver to go after them.

Because the train is the slowest moving train in history the driver manages to catch up but Bond is out of bullets, he enters the cabin of one of the venicles the train is carrying, and swings the digger around, hoping to hit the perp, but he is shot and instead knocks some cars in front of our driver. (Hope your insurance is paid up) also they’re VW Beetles according to the driver (by them now $30,000) Bond recovers, managing to pilot the digger forward on it’s tracks, crushing the cars beneath it (the things you do for product placement)

The perp uncouples the cars with his gun (because he can totally do that) Bond latches onto the cart in front with the digger (because he can totally do that, these must be really cheap trains) bond climbs the digger and jumps into the carriage of people who really should be more scared as the back of the carriage is ripped off. Bond manages to catch up with the perp, tackling him and fighting happens, our driver continues her pursuit (surely the train should be picking up speed by now)

I've got them in my very sights, permission to terminate

The driver reaches the end of the road, somehow ahead of the train, and sets up a sniper shot. M tells her to take the shot, despite the fact it might hit James. Bond is hit and falls of the train, falling into the water several miles below, and letting the perp get away.

Time for our custom song, Skyfall by Adele. It’s a really nice song. Here’s my gripe. JAMES BOND SHOULD BE DEAD. He’s suffering from 2 bullet wounds, falls miles into the water below, and then falls off a waterfall as well.

The opening is really surreal, I quite like it, but I’m not gonna comment on it too much as it’s not really part of the story. We return to London, MI6. Where M is typing the obituary for James Bond. She later drives past a church to a commander they exposit that 3 months ago (seriously, it’s been 3 months, why hasn’t our villain done anything yet?) the computer drive was stolen. It contained the identities of all NATO agents embedded in terrorist organisations across the world (I swear I heard this plot before, in a movie I’m reviewing for a Theme Month soon) The Prime Minister has ordered an inquiry (after 3 months, about the usual speed of bureaucracy there then.)

The commander, Gareth Mallory, expects M to resign over her failings but she refuses. As she drives alert she receives an alert from Q-branch that someone’s trying to decrypt the drive (again, after 3 months) they’re trying to trace it, but it ends up tracing to MI6, to M’s computer) they try to shut it down but it fails and MI6 explodes for good measure.

Michael Bay, your porn has arrived!

We cut random remote island where James Bond is having sex with a woman . Buy Heiniken now, $5 a bottle. Bond takes some pills and heads out, walking along a beach to a bar. This bar, by the power of plot convenience happens to have CNN in English. (Why? How? Who cares? Bond’s back into action)

M sees to the burial of all the agents caught into the blast, promising to find the person responsible by whatever means necessary. She returns home and finds James Bond in her room (how did he get in?) he reports for duty but before he can do so, he needs to past the tests. The next morning James is debriefed as he’s taken to a new underground headquarters. Bond undergoes physical assessments as he continues to hear exposition (making me wonder just how long the full speeches if he’s still expositing with each exercise. The person who took the drive did it had a personal vendetta against M.

Bond tries shooting, but he’s shaky and the bullets miss their intended target. He goes for psychological evaluation, they do word association but Bond walks out after hearing the word ‘Skyfall’ He undresses and uses a knife to cut into his skin and remove some shrapnel from his bullet wound. He orders them to be analysed.

 

Before you get the job you need to pass this interview

M looks over the tests, and it seems that he passed. He’s back on active service, barely. They’ve got the analysis of the shards, only a few of them use that type of bullet. The track the shooter to Shanghai, probably to kill a target, Bond is to await him and find out who he worked for. Once James is gone, M reveals he did not actually pass the tests.

Bond meets with Q, who gives him his gadgets for the series. A gun that only James can fire, and a tracking device (which would’ve been very useful when trailing a certain shooter 3 months ago) and that’s it. I’ll give it this, neither of them are dues ex-machinas.

 

I think I had one of these in the 60s, it was smaller

We cut to Shanghai lots and lots of establishing shots. James swims for a bit, then arrives at the bar. He gets an alert of someone coming in on the next flight. He disguises himself as a driver and waits for him, following his vehicle across the only road that isn’t busy. The shooter arrives at a building, and James pulls up. He sees the shooter kill the guard and drag his body away. James follows

He sees the shooter enter an elevator, and manages to grab the bottom of it, following him up (lucky the elevator is exposed like this, or it might be incredibly awkward) the lift stops, and the shooter exits with James carefully following. He enters a dark room, and oh goody this is where our fight scene is going to be. I always wanted a fight scene shot in the dark.

 

Always leaving me hanging, aren't you?

The shooter prepares to shoot at someone in the building opposite, he succeeds and is confronted by Bond. Oh good, I can barely see what’s going on. Looks like Bond won the fight and has the shooter over the edge of the building, but Bond can’t hold on and he falls to his death, catching only the sight of the beautiful woman on the other side before disappearing.

He spots the glass cutter he used containing a chip to a casino. M meanwhile receives a message, a link to a YouTube video blowing the covers of 5 agents. We cut to Macau, to the place where that chip originated (who carries a casino chip in a case anyway?) James receives a knock on the door; it’s our driver from earlier with a message, mostly exposition we already know. So Bond arrives at the casino by boat, because... He’s in communication with our driver by radio.

I'm sorry, 5 skulls means you do not win our fantastic prize

Bond tries to cash in the chip, worth a substantial amount of money plus a few bonus chips. He eyes a pretty woman with a few guards. She comes down to talk and they go for a drink. She knows that he killed the shooter and James reveals he wants to meet the employer (yeah, that does remind me, we’re nearly an hour into the movie, and we haven’t met our main villain yet)

Apparently she was sold into prostitution at age 12, which will make any further scenes with them very uncomfortable. The guards control her. She reveals that when she leaves her guards will try to kill him. If he survives, she’ll take him to his boss. James tries to leave but is quickly surrounded. James using the briefcase with the money as a weapon fights off the guards.

He makes it to the woman’s boat, and… This is really uncomfortable to watch. There had to be better ways to do this than the way it’s done here. In London, we get the revelation that 3 of the 5 undercover agents have been assassinated. M will be standing at the stocks tomorrow to plead her case. (Why would the opposition parties try and attack MI6? It’d surely be best to unite over the tragedy rather than turn this into a political scheme, especially since it would’ve happened regardless of which party is in power)

 

Remember, she was sold into prostitution as a child, enjoy

The boat arrives near the island, and Bond activates his radio. The crew of the ship have him at gunpoint. The Island looks like it faced some sort of crisis. The big bad took the island by making people think that plague had spread. Bond is tied to a chair, and finally 1 hour and 8 minutes into the movie we finally meet our main villain.

Our villain tries to turn Bond against M, even revealing that he failed the rests, but he fails. He reveals that he’s rigged computers that can accomplish almost anything, from rigging an election to blowing up MI6. He unties Bond and takes him outside, where he has that former prostitute tied up and bleeding. Our villain places a glass on her head, and tells Bond to shoot. Bond shoots, missing her entirely but our villain kills her.

I love you, baby, but I love Bond more

Bond reacts, taking out the guards leaving our villain on his own. MI6 have finally caught up and have him surrounded. M comes to visit our villain. Turns out he was formerly an undercover agent who was found out and tortured. He cracked his cyanide capsule, but was spared for some reason. M walks to the inquiry which has a fairly large audience.

M reveals more to Bond. His real name is Tiago Roderigez, he began acting beyond his brief in an undercover op, so she gave him up. Q begins hacking into his hard drive, plugging it into the MI6 network. Q gets in with a little help from bond, but the hack bursts open all the locks. Bond runs to his cell, but somehow Tiago has killed the guards, despite being unarmed and has retreated underground.  Bond pursues through the subway. Q thinks this attack was years in the planning and him getting caught was intentional.

You all need to reflect on your actions

The problem is a lot of co-incidences lead up to him getting caught. He had to know that in they’d track the shooter to China in exactly 3 months time, kill him, find the chip, get to the Casino in Macau, survive the ambush, hook up with the prostitute, take her boat to the island, and activate the radio. James joins the crowd in the Underground, following Silva. Silva boards the train, disguised as a police officer, and James gets on after him.

At the hearing, a minister attacks M’s supposed ineptitude during the crisis. The pursuit continues with them both getting off the train and into an abandoned tunnel. Silva has explosives plated there because… He blows a hole in the tunnel and a train falls through it, likely killing most of the people on board. James survives as Silva comes in and shoots up the courthouse. Bond arrives and creates a smokescreen, allowing everyone to escape alive. (Apart from the police)

I've heard of the bullet train but this is ridiculous

James abducts M from her usual driver, hoping to use M as bait for Silva. M agrees, hoping that keeping it between her and Bond might help save their lives. Bond contacts Q telling him to lay out a trail only Silva could follow. They change cars (classic Aston Martin of course) and head across the country to Scotland. Bond stops in the mountains for the trailer; this is apparently where Bond grew up.

They travel into the country, where Silva’s computers are less likely to have an effect. The house they’re staying at is called Skyfall. They enter the house and are greeted by Kincade, gamekeeper of the house and yet another person to know his real name (seriously, how is this guy a secret agent when everyone knows his real name?) Lacking weaponry they have to get inventive as to how they stop Silva’s goons. And when I say inventive I mean fill the house with traps like Home Alone

Oh yeah, Skyfall, the title of the movie, so glad at over 90 minutes into the movie we find out what it means

Kincade reveals to M a secret passageway leading under the moor, then they begin setting up their traps. Seriously: this super-secret spy action film, geared at adults, is ripping off Home Alone. My expectations have dipped drastically. They hear dogs barking signalling that the enemy has arrived and they approach, very slowly. They seem to ignore the car, but they live to regret it as bond is inside and begins shooting.

Between lots of shooting and the home alone traps going off without a hitch the men go down. Silva is not amongst them, but they hear a helicopter approaching, playing rock music and ready to fire. Bond and co retreat as the house is shot. Bond orders the others to retreat using the tunnel as the Helicopter lands, with Silva on board. Silva deploys his forces, throwing grenades into the house, setting it ablaze.

Silva orders the others not to harm M as he wants to be the one to kill her. They head through the tunnel, with M bleeding from a gunshot wound. James takes two gas canisters as Silva has bond’s car blown up. Bond places sticks of dynamatie on the gas canisters and lights them, the resulting explosion destroying the house and Silva’s helicopter. Bond retreats into the tunnel, barely able to escape the blast. (Whoever paid for that house would be very very very annoyed)

I don't care how goofy it is, a car with guns is awesome!

Silva survives (because if you can survive cyanide you can survive anything and proceeds to make his way to the moor, seeing the torchlight from M in that direction. Bond emerges from the tunnel and runs in, taking down one of Silva’s 2 surviving henchmen. The moor has frozen over and Bond begins running but he’s brought to a halt by Silva’s gunfire. His other henchman has caught up.

Bond grabs the gun and makes him shoot a hole in the ice taking out the other henchman. And barely getting out of the ice himself (he grabs a guys flare launcher and shoots a flare revealing the hole) Silva passes the grave-marker of Bond’s parents as he makes his way into the chapel, confronting M at last.

I love you, babe, but I love Bond more!

Bond arrives, throwing a knife into Silva’s back but he’s still alive, for a few seconds at least. M collapses from the earlier bullet wound and passes away in James’ arms. I’ll get to my feelings on how this played out when I summarise my views, safe to say, I have 1 particular problem with it.

In London James stands atop a building for another trailer shot. Our driver from earlier (we’ll find out her name soon) comes and reveals she’s not going back onto active service (it’s a throwaway line I didn’t cover earlier, but James said that fieldwork isn’t for everyone, take that feminism!) M left Bond the nodding dog he found annoying (from another couple of lines from earlier) a sign not to go to a desk job.

Of all the flags we can't see, it's nice that the gold old UK flag is the one we can

They go to her office where Bond says they’ve never been formally introduced (really? You were partnered together on assignment in the beginning of the movie, figure knowing each other’s names would be a pretty basic requirement for that) and she introduces herself as Miss Moneypenny, which I certain people who know will see the reference. James goes to his new boss, Gareth Mallory, to get his new assignment and that’s the end of the movie

Skyfall is an interesting movie. The story for the first 3^rd is fantastic (all be it the very awkward scenes with the former prostitute) problems start to develop the moment the villain is introduced. We’re made to think that he’s very smart and uses technology to do whatever he wants, which is true enough. But I am left wandering: why did he want to get caught again? He could’ve flown under an alias to the UK, disguised himself as a police officer and shot up the courthouse without a single person even aware of who he was.

James bond, being dragged into the water by a hand? What the f*ck am I watching?

I assume his ego is his weakness, his desire for revenge against M leads to him wanting a face to face with her before he kills her, hence the plot to get himself captured, escape and shoot up the courthouse from there. But the amount of planning that would take, combined with the number of coincidences it relied upon made it a rather weak plan for such a smart villain.

His defeat wasn’t satisfying to me either. A villain that targeted M is nice, but it should’ve been M that got retribution. She should’ve been the one to end up killing Silva, even if at the cost of her own life. Instead she dies by hand of one of Silva’s men, Silva effectively won their encounter, taken out because he underestimate Bond. M should be shown as competent in her own right, and should’ve died as such. Here she’s just another victim of Silva. The ending in general is pretty weak, the home alone stuff, despite an attempt to play it straight still came off as goofy.

The action is shot in the dark, making it difficult to follow. But despite my problems I have a lot to like about this film. The characters (Silva notwithstanding) are all excellent, Q and Miss Moneypenny excel in their roles, and whilst Miss Moneypenney doesn’t contribute too much to the film, she was shown as a no-nonsense character and competent in her own right (OK, she shot Bond, but she was lucky she hit anything shooting at a moving train from a stationary point)

Q also had some great moments, laying the trail of breadcrumbs for Silva to follow, whilst he was never an active part of the action, he was a useful character whilst Bond was in the UK, although I wish he was part of the team whilst Bond was overseas. No interesting gadgets (I can’t compare against previous bond films, but they managed interesting gadgets in Stormbreaker) but a radio and a gun are decent enough.

Rage Rating: -85%

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Images used in this review are from Skyfall and belong to their respective owners. All images in this review are subject to fair use.