#51 - Batman and Harley Quinn

Oh boy, we’ve got a bad one for this entry. And I wanted to start with a simple question. Bruce Timm, what happened to you?

Bruce Timm has become somewhat of a legend when it comes to superhero stuff, being one of the guys behind the excellent DCAU and the very good Green Lantern: The Animated series, which I will eventually cover as a retrospective.

Then he took some time off, when he first came back it was for Justice League: Gods and Monsters; a unique take on the trinity of Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman where their morals are more grey than usual. It was good, even great, but then something happened, his next movie was the Killing Joke. I ripped this movie apart back in May, particular for that abysmal opening third featuring Batman and Batgirl having sex on a rooftop.

So, for this story, one that’s completely unique, they wanted to tone down the darker tone and focus on humour. That’s fine. Justice League Action, which is a solid if shallow show did that exact thing. But here’s the thing, being a comedy whilst also being adult-orientated can lend itself to some very bad things. I’m looking at you, FAMILY GUY!

So, are we talking At World’s End comedy or Dude, Where’s my Car? comedy? Would it really be here if it wasn’t the latter?

So, after a piracy warning and a painful reminder that I actually paid money for this we open in Star Labs and I can give the first element of praise for this movie. The visual style of the movie is a deliberate homage to Batman: The Animated Series, the gothic red-sky style, it does look a little cleaner than it did back in the day, your mileage may vary on the charm of that.

Anyway, so some cops are fighting off the Floronic man, wait who? He’s the guy who wanted to get the world stoned. Anyway, he was the one who endowed Poison Ivy with her abilities I think, and she’s here too, doing what every plant lady wants to do, hacking. She finds what they’re looking for, a chemical formula with a reference to Alec Holland aka Swamp Thing (although I’m getting ahead of myself).

OK, second bit of credit, this chibi opening is funny and has a bit of charm to it, it also foreshadows one of my bigger gripes with movie, but we’ll get to that in a bit. So, we cut back to the lab where Batman and Nightwing have found what the two were trying to steal, Batman reveals how Alec Holland was a scientist who devised a formula for desert plantations but was ultimately killed in his conveniently near a swamp house by a saboteur, the chemicals reacted in the heat with the swamp water or something and transformed him into Swamp Thing.

So, they have two objectives, find out what they’re planning and find out where they are, Batman has a theory and takes the first whilst Nightwing is left to try and track them down, doing that means finding Harley Quinn, who’s been out of the crime biz for a while. Batman heads to ARGUS and asks about a missing person who hasn’t been leaked to the media. OK… No lies, this is a solid start, the threat feels real and Batman coming to ARGUS even if it’s to some no-named grunt. And honestly the first jokes kinda work too. Unfortunately, we’re only 5 minutes in.

So, Nightwing is doing the search for Harley, and jesus, I get the reference to the old style but did you have to make the visuals that grainy. This is blatantly Flash animated, not hand drawn, you can do better than that! Also we get the first bad jokes of the movie. So Nightwing passes a place called Super-babes, a place that exists purely for men to gawk at women in skin-tight outfits. Charming, Harley stops a perv pinching her ass by breaking his wrist. Nightwing knows its her. No, that’s not Harley, it’s a STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN! *cue theme song* This stereotype is aggravating because often it prevents characters from having any meaningful arcs. Harley is not a strong independent woman, she’s quite the opposite. Sure, I’d like to see her fight against the Joker’s manipulation, but once that’s over, there’s little more story to be told, although god knows they’ve tried over the years.

That’s not to say a strong independent character can’t be done right, but there needs to be more to them than that beyond the surface, and I’m sorry, this has infecting characters in movies for decades, from Barb Wire to Catwoman and from the Cinderella remake, to even the Emoji movie.

So, Nightwing immediately recognises her as Harley despite being a STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN cliché and so follows her on her way home, past all the very static background characters. She lives in the condemned district apparently. She somehow manages to hear Nightwing and he asks why she’s not using her psychiatric training to help and is instead in a hooters bar.

Yeah, it’s the exactly the explanation you’re all thinking of. Harley refuses to help until Nightwing points out she hasn’t reported to her parole officer in months, that’s kind of stupid, Harley. That provokes her into a fight. And here’s another problem, Harley is not a fighter, at least not on the level on someone like Nightwing. Nightwing should be able to finish this easily, but this is Bruce Timm fan-fiction verse. Apparently she has some joker venom in a ring that NOPE! One, that’s a ring with a spike on it, Nightwing would’ve noticed!

“No offence to your best people, but they’re not me” doesn’t that sound exactly like a line out of a piece of bad fan-fiction? Batman finds a piece of leaf which he knows immediately is from another dimension, leading to the Floronic Man. Batman also outright says that ARGUS’ forensic people are bad, flipping ARGUS!

So, time for the worst scene in the movie. Instead of trying to relocate from one abysmal den to another, or just, you know, reporting to her parole officer like she should’ve been doing anyway, she has Nightwing tied up in her bed and is talking to herself about how stupid a move that was. She doesn’t want to kill him because she’s quit that life, and assault and abduction, alongside possession of an illegal substance (the joker venom) those aren’t crimes at all. Also because he’s cute, but we’re getting ahead of ourselves with that one.

Actually no, we’re not, let’s just skip to the meat of this scene HARLEY RAPES NIGHTWING! I don’t care that the last line is ‘the things I do’ HE WAS TIED TO THE BED, HE DIDN’T HAVE A CHOICE! And all this for what, for Batman to burst in, wondering whether or not he was being attacked. Rape is treated as a joke for this movie and that is unacceptable and no, it wouldn’t make a difference if it were the other way around. This feels like the rooftop scene all over again, except this time it isn’t even consensual, and treated as a joke.

When it comes to using a rape in a story, you’re already treading on egg-shells with me, the feelings of the victim and their actions following the rape should be done respectfully. Here, like so many rape plots, it’s never mentioned again after this scene. This is an insult, and another moment that comes off like bad fan-fiction. But what’s so strange about this is it feels like Bruce Timm didn’t learn from the controversy of the Killing Joke and just did the same thing but worse. Also, yes, Nightwing flirts with Harley and it comes off as incredibly creepy. NO, THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT NOT RAPE!   

So, with that thought uncomfortably lodged in my brain, we cut to the Floronic man being disgusted at the idea that Poison Ivy uses her kisses for mind control, something which she’s presumably been doing for some time now. Also, they have the same motivation as Valentine from Kingsman, which they’re expositing now for no good reason. That being something-something-something-climate change-something

So, Batman does that thing I mentioned he did earlier. Ha, it was a joke. Look, if I’m wrong, and the rape as I see it didn’t really happen, they are in costume and Nightwing is unrestrained when Batman finds them after all, the fact that it’s implied is bad enough for me. Also Nightwing’s embarrassment over the issue is not funny!

So, with that awkwardness over, Batman refuses her terms but invites her along because that can’t possibly end badly. And f*ck the joke that happens immediately upon Harley getting in the car. F*ck it so hard that it flies to sun and burns to death! Batman believes that Ivy and the Floronic man are planning to synthesise a virus using chemicals similar to the ones that created Swamp Thing, and ‘save the world’ with it. You know, this would make a lot more sense if Ra’s al Ghul were doing it. I never thought Poison Ivy had this kind of scope, plus she was more interested in keeping flowers alive than saving the planet from global warming, not that they’re entirely mutually exclusive. As for the Floronic man, may I remind you he once planned to get the world high on weed. The virus will turn people into animal-plant hybrids or possibly kill everyone if their plan is off even slightly.

But time for a completely pointless interlude as Harley chases down an idiot who owes her money or something. Is this to show Harley’s crazy, we’ve seen enough of that already thanks. With that bit of pointlessness over, we continue the pointlessness until we actually get a lead, and it mentions Bludhaven, Nightwing’s home town. But before we get to that, we get the fart joke, twice. This was supposed to be for adults, right?

So, they arrive at the dance club where all the stock characters from the animated series reside, it’s a cut reference, but here’s my where my grievance with the animation becomes a problem. You can tell the dancing is them just going between 2 poses over and over again. Also the singers are literal clones of each other, though their singing is pretty good. To get the deal with Harley’s associate, Harley agrees to sing and yes, this is a carbon copy of that scene from Harleyquinade, except there it was an original song. One of the crooks decides to dance behind Batman. For that egregious crime, Batman punches him unconscious and of course that’s gonna lead to a fight, A FIGHT WE DON’T EVEN SEE! Just the sounds from Batman ’66, and even in Batman ’66 they would’ve shown the action scene.

So, in a scene that is completely pointless Booster Gold calls from the watchtower and gives Batman a selection of lesser-known heroes which Nightwing silently rejects. You know the Enlongated Man is a detective and actually could’ve been helpful, but nope, just a joke. This whole goddamned movie is a joke, I tell you.

So, they test out formula on a mouse and it does into a plant person, but as the Floronic Man is in the middle of his triumphant speech... (Yes, it’s that kind of movie, he’s giving a triumphant speech to Poison Ivy, who already knows his plan and a Doctor who’s under mind control) anyway, the mouse dies as he makes his pathetic speech. The Doctor theorises that using swamp water from the nearby swamp isn’t good enough and they should try and use water from the same swamp that gave birth to Swamp Thing. The swamp water leads into the Gulf of Mexico where the virus will spread through the ocean.

Ah, but time for some action as Batman, Harley and Nightwing arrive. Batman’s attacks have no effect on the Floronic Man and in the battle, they manage to set everything on fire. The Doctor comes out of mind control and the Floronic man kills him so they can escape. Harley briefly notes the circled location as the building explodes. They survive that somehow with barely anything to show for it. Well, Harley contributed nothing to the fight and for some reason she cares about the Doctor’s life. He survived too, although he’s not looking good, he says they need swamp water in Louisiana to complete the formula before passing away. This is treated like an incredibly tragic moment, touching music, even Harley seems sad, something which will become a problem later on.

Ivy is feeling guilty about leaving Harley to die. Harley and Ivy are an interesting pair, they play off each other quite well in a way that’s different to Harley and the Joker. If they were going to go with a Harley without the Joker, I would rather they focused on the two of them, something which is only amplified by events later on. Anyway, Floronic Man has magic yams that allow them to teleport so they can avoid the police because of course he does.

So after Harley isn’t funny some more and a scene between Nightwing and Harley alone. Honestly, it makes me uncomfortable. Oh, it’s good to see the old design batwing again. Batman and Nightwing prepare to leave, Harley tries to convince them to take her along and Batman makes a puzzling speech.

“You’re the very definition of loose cannon, Harley. For all I know you could decide their plan isn’t so cock-eyed after all because the wind changed direction or because it’s Thursday”

Look, this movie doesn’t give you a lot to go on with regards to Harley’s character, so I’m basically assuming she’s supposed to be like the Batman: The Animated Series version. So this speech is perplexing. It’s not that Harley wouldn’t betray them but the reasoning he gave for it. I did joke in my Suicide Squad skit that Harley would turn on them in a dime, but the Joker was still alive and actively involved in the story and they still loved each other. Here, she’s moved on and I’m not sure what her character is anymore, these seemingly random changes are not and never were what would cause Harley to turn. She’s crazy, but her form of crazy has its own logic, in her case, personal connection to the target. Again, this feels like a line out of bad fan-faction and doesn’t have a lot of backing in the movie itself. Naturally this line is forced in to foreshadow something later on. 

But despite him being adamant, Harley begs him some more and he eventually relents. So, the military are storming the swamp with guns we know won’t effect the Floronic man and isn’t Batman against using guns. OK, there’s a moment that isn’t funny about bugs and soon they’re attacked by Ivy’s watchdogs, several military guys are killed off, and no-one bats an eyelid!

So Harley pushes Batman and Nightwing into an Ivy Trap, because it’s Thursday she says. But really she wants to get close enough to Ivy to be able to talk to her, which is actually smart. Harley delivers her next line at 50 miles an hour and it isn’t funny. Ivy obviously refuses her offer and Harley frees Batman and Nightwing. So, Harley and Ivy fight, this would be interesting if I didn’t know Ivy could win in seconds, especially given their location in the middle of a swamp. But they decide to make it a fist fight for really no good reason. Nightwing and Batman double team the Floronic Man, it goes about as well as you’d expect, as in the Floronic Man kicks their asses along with more military that’ll never be mentioned again.

Eventually, and I mean FINALLY, Ivy uses her powers to restrain Harley, and Harley realises Ivy hasn’t even tested the formula yet, the formula that could potentially kill everything. So Harley unleashes her most powerful weapon yet, her sad face. And Ivy actually falls for it. WHAT THE HELL! Seriously? Yeah, the two cry and hug and did I mention bad fan-fiction?

OK, so now for a fight that might actually be interesting, Ivy vs the Floronic Man, Ivy’s control over plants vs the Floronic man basically being a plant, pity she gets sucker-punched before much happens. So, the Floronic man is about to unleash virus when we see Swamp Thing! Oh my god, I could forgive everything! Swamp Thing is awesome and rarely done well in animation this could be… another gigantic let-down as he just gives a speech and leaves. So how is this pretty major threat ended, WE DON’T KNOW! I mean, the Floronic Man is about to unleash the virus, Harley suggests using fire against him and they kiss her for that suggestion, by which time the Floronic man probably could’ve put the virus in the water anyway, and the movie ends!

OK, they put a mid-credits stinger of the Floronic man running away on fire! That solves everything I guess…

Actually, it’s not over, there’s more. And boy is this confusing. Harley is now the host of a new game show where people who are possibly mentally unwell people partake in a gruelling obstacle course in order to win therapy, there’s even a reference to the wipeout big balls. That is not funny, this is gross and disturbing and WHY WOULD ANY NETWORK EVER AIR THIS?!

THIS MOVIE GIVES ME RAGE ISSUES!

I don’t know what happened here, but this entire story plays out like bad fan fiction, and that comes from someone who writes bad fan-fiction! The over-glorification of Batman can be as annoying if it’s not self-aware like say, the Lego Batman movie was. Harley Quinn is even more perplexing, her character doesn’t feel like the Batman: The Animated Series version, despite them basically ripping off the aesthetic. She’s a strong independent woman stereotype with the occasional moments of crazy, she’s also bisexual because that’s apparently attractive.

Yes, that little point, there are a lot of shots, particularly early on in the movie which are very fan-servicey, it’s not funny nor is it good to encourage in animation.

From a story perspective, the pacing is far too slow, we don’t get an encounter with the main villains until 2/3 through the movie, as it’s too busy setting up Harley’s involvement and Batman discovering his plan. Them cutting it off and not wrapping anything up with a proper epilogue is rather unfortunate.

As a comedy, I don’t remember laughing at a single joke, even the ones they featured prominently in the trailers. Dude, where’s my car! Got more of a laugh out of me than this.

The animation feels rather low-budget for a DC-animated film, there’s no memorable action scenes because the battles are all one-sided, or should have been in the case of Harley vs Ivy or Harley vs Nightwing. They really needed a memorable henchman or two, even if they’re plants that they can fight. When they do have a balanced fight, they end it before it can get interesting. It’s a shame, because the visual style, reminiscent of Batman: The Animated Series is pretty good.

That said, with the exception of the rape scene, it doesn’t reach the same levels of offensive terribleness that Dude, where’s my car reached? The voice acting is solid, pedalled by the return of Kevin Conroy and Loren Lester as Batman and Nightwing. For the part she was played, Melissa Rauch was a fine Harley Quinn and I don’t lay blame for any of my problems with the portrayal on her.

Rating 85%